Friday Follies - Leap Day Edition...

Happy LEAP DAY, and to all those people who have birthdays on the 29th of February, and are 1/4th the age the REST of us are....well, sorry, but it shows.

We've got plenty of movement in our society today. It might not be in the direction we desire, but at least we're not just sitting still (unless you're a neighbor of mine down here), so this shark is still breathing.

An elevator operator once told me a quaint axiom:

"It's not all the UPS and DOWNS that bother me...it's ALL THE JERKS!"
With that in mind, let's get this party going.

GOING UP?

The bids for COSTAPLENTY (Harrison) SQUARE are higher than the city "thought" (wonder what drugs they were taking?), and utility costs for installations ranging from electrcity to plumbing to an elevator are adding more $$$ to this project. A reader commented on the editorial page of today's J/G, and compared this project to a BERMUDA TRIANGLE saying that whenever our money gets near to it (the project), the money DISAPPEARS.

Now that was cute. True, yet still cute.

GOING DOWN?

The pace at which the economy in America is growing (the GDP) has slowed to 6/10th of one percent. And although it's STILL not a recession, the MSM thinks it IS. Granted the growth is negligible, but it is growing...just not as FAST as all the ADHD marketing gurus running Wall Street would like. Oh, boo-frigging-hoo boys and girls. See what happens when people become SO used to "instant gratification"?

GOING NOWHERE?

Rasheed Martin, 27 (another one of Ft. Wayne's 3-time losers) of the 3900 block of Avondale (which LOOKS like a neighborhood HE'D be comfortable in) won't be going anywhere but to JAIL. This cocaine-dealing f$ckup led police on a chase which ended up on someone's lawn in Waynedale around 2230 hrs Wednesday. He dove over the backseat (where police had spotted him) and used his HAND on the car's accelerator as a woman in the driver's seat steered the vehicle. One other woman was also in the car. I guess it's a "cultural" thang that attracts young black women to a jerk such as this Snoop-Dog wannabe.

Role model?

Don't make me f$cking laugh!

And don't forget to drop that soap, Rasheed...inmates LIKE when you do that!

GOING UP?

The FWIA has unveiled THEIR new logo (must be contagious) and has even produced a new slogan: "A Whole New Altitude".

Gee, I wonder if that means that all the flights will RETURN to the FAA MINIMUM of 1100 FEET when they overfly my house, instead of the 700 FEET (or in some cases much lower) limit they have been flying at? At FOUR miles out, 700 feet (or lower) is a little too damn CLOSE for my taste, and I have always loved airplanes. I don't ike having one wind up in MY yard, should something go drastically wrong (and with the natives around here that love to shoot off guns in the air). I suppose that logo and slogan cost well over the $15K that FWCS spent on THEIR logo. At least it looks as if the same company did NOT make both logos.

Officials also announced the construction of a $158,000 welcome center inside the main terminal that will include the hosts’ information desk and electronics-charging stations.

Better use of OUR money?

I don't think so.

GOING DOWN?

Antonio Wright, 20 (must be one of Rasheed's homey understudies?) of the 3300 block of Portage Boulevard (they seem to LOVE this part of town, don't they?) received a MIXED verdict, with the jury finding him GUILTY on EIGHT counts and NOT GUILTY on THREE counts.

And guess what?

Those THREE counts included the most SERIOUS, naturally (burglary causing bodily harm). Seems 3 key witnesses reneged on their promise to testify against Wright (honor among homey thieves, eh?) just moments before the jury heard opening statements in the case.

(and we call THIS crap JUSTICE?)

Austin Knight 18; Malcolm Ellis, 17; and Johnnie Walker (yeah that name is funny), 19. Remember those names, because you'll HEAR from them AGAIN, trust me. And Antonio will be back out soon enough as well, so keep him in your sights too.

GOING UP?

Yeah, it's the price of gas...and wait until OPEC starts slowing production next month (but you didn't hear me say that).

GOING DOWN?

Wall Street does a triple digit dive (but I expect it rebound as soon as some world leader wipes his ass and flushes).

GOING UP?

The prison population in America has reached a new record. More than 1 in EVERY 100 people in this nation is currently in JAIL. And it's got the people wondering HOW to deal with this increase.

I've got some solutions.

How's about offing some of these f$ckwads? (electricty is still pretty cheap)

Or deporting them? (close to 25% of the prison population are illegals)

This speaks volumes on our "trying to understand and rehabilitate" these incorrigibles, doesn't it? There ARE people in this world you JUST cannot "fix" (take Hitler for example), so why waste resources and prison space in a vain attempt to do so? And sadly, that filters all the way down to the juvenile level as well. Time to CHANGE the system, and not try to "rethink" any of it.

Lastly, more snow, more delays, more accidents, more caution.

Ahh, yes, the vicissitudes of life.

It's not necessarliy about the UPS & DOWNS...

...but it IS all about all the damn JERKS.

DO have a SAFE weekend - Drive carefully.

Thursday Tidbits...

It's another beautiful (and frigid) day on the city's south side, and that means you're relatively SAFE to walk (in) the streets (the sidewalks STILL aren't cleared off...nothing new there)...until 1100 hrs, when all the locals decide to fall out of the sack. Then we start the whole "circle of life" thing all over again. Ahh, I can hear the drums now.

Still, that won't prevent me from bringing you some of my pungent social commentary on the state of affairs in, around, and beyond the Summit City.

- Man Dies In Snowmobile Crash -

An Auburn man suffered blunt force trauma injuries to his chest and died when he struck the handlebars of his snowmobile after it ran into a ditch late Tuesday night. The snowmobile entered the ditch at high speed off of DeKalb County Road 43 near Auburn. Police are still investigating the crash. Evel Kneivel he wasn't. Now one would THINK that riding along AT NIGHT...while snow was falling...on an all white terrain, that some caution would be exercised.

It wasn't.

I can tell you that under those conditions, there is this little "thing" called DEPTH PERCEPTION, as in it goes away REAL fast when the topography has no contrast. You can't see rocks, logs, ditches, and anything else at ground level. And objects you "think" are far are really close (like the side rearview mirrors of a vehicle).

Some people just have to learn the hard way.

- Fort Wayne Raises Water Rates -

Yeah, it's another "stagflationary adjustment", just like the one you'll be getting in your PAYCHECK. What's that you say?

You aren't getting one of those?

Do tell.

Rates will be RISING around 2.8%, and will vary based on location throughout the city. Rates range from a "mere" $547 per residential unit on the SOUTHEAST SIDE of the city (yay...!), to a "generous" $5,440 in the Deer Track Service area (boo...!), so we've got a wide diversity of costs. The fees are paid by developers at the time they complete new areas, OR by property owners in areas newly connecting to City Utilities (sorry all you Aqua Indiana people...welcome to Fort Wayne).

- Mayor (King) Henry Delivers Speech -

Um...I much prefer Henry the V..or King Lear.

Question: If the DEMOCRATS are ALWAYS for the "common man" and seek changes to help HIM , why all the spending INCREASES aimed right AT that common man???

(curiouser and curiouser indeed)

- More People On Food Stamps -

And my wife and I are not two of them. Yessireee, we can blame the economy on this boondoggle, along with a state-driven "outreach" (I thought that was only for evangelists?) for the rise in Indiana residents applying for food stamps. Hell, I can see that much at Scotts every week. They're the people tying up the damn checkout lines while we wait and pay with REAL money from OUR pocket (and not everyone else's money). But I shouldn't hold anything against these people, even if they ARE wearing nice threads, and pushing that overflowing shopping cart to their BRAND NEW SUV. Nah, that's not like me. They "deserve" the food stamps they get. After all, they MUST be poor.

(BWAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahaha..yeah, right, and I'm the REAL mayor of this city)

- WIlliam F. Buckley Dies -

Other bloggers reported this yesterday (he died Tuesday at the age of 82), and I wanted to toss another 2 cents in regarding this master of the spoken word, but all I can say now is: "Well, there goes the English language..down the crapper".

- And Speaking of Death -

All of northeast Indiana's coroners have completed certification, and are now, FINALLY able to pronounce a dead person...dead. Makes me wonder what KIND of "training" is involved:

Top Ten Signs of a Deceased Person:

10- What a wonderful SMELL you've discovered.

9- They TOLD him to let GO of that dynamite stick.

8- We're going to need a bigger shovel.

7- You DID say there were TWO people in that meth lab, right?

6- Yeah, they ALL look like Keith Richard any more.

5- I have to FIND an ARM to get a PULSE, stupid!

4- Oh look, a body double for Weekend At Bernie's

3- Maybe that telephone pole through his chest is a clue?

2- He's stiff as a board...in more ways than one.

1- You grab his legs..I'll walk back to the house and get the rest of him.

So there you are...some of the macabre, some of the banal, and lots of pithiness to go around. Please use sparingly, as some people might have a reaction to this brand of "medication".

And do drive safely..it's still slicker than snot on a doorknob out there.

(eeewww...did he REALLY say that?)

Hey, you know me.

Happy Hump Day...
Middle of the week (already?), and I have to hand it to the city's snow removal team. We ACTUALLY had our residential streets PLOWED in less than a day!
Who'da thunk?
They better be careful, because such behavior could lead to scores of citizens becoming jovial toward a city department. Next thing you know, people will become responsible (down here anyway), and then downright friendly...where WILL it all end?
Well, I can tell you where it begins....right HERE!
City Council votes *yes* to abatements:
Well, every city council member but Mitch Harper did, and I have to hand it to our "other Man Mitch"...he's got the cajones to speak his mind and not just "rubber-stamp" anything and everything coming down the pike. And he explained a lot during the public session, where we had none other than our very own Jeff Pruitt taking the mic and telling it "like it really is" regarding abatements.
WTG, Jeff!
My take on abatements is simple....use them SPARINGLY, and use them WISELY, 'cause people (like us) are watching every move you city officials make. And we WILL call you on it. If an abatement is to "cajole" a business into coming to the city (make setting up shop here more desireable), the taxpayer shoulders the burden for the taxes NOT garnered from that business through the duration OF that abatement.
Simple, huh?
Think of this as an "incentive" for that business (which hopefully will eventually be paying taxes after the abatement runs out). Sometimes the business folds up, and the city is left with a nice HOLE where their tax money should have been.
Again, we taxpayers foot the bill.
So, where is the "incentive" FOR the taxpayer anyway? The city wants to halt the flight FROM it's limits, but does little if anything to address our concerns. We don't get an incentive to remain. We get no "abatement" for anything. We DO get a homestead credit (which can be eaten away in a few years, trust me on this one)...big friggin' whoop!
And although I didn't like John Crawford's smoking ban, I still admire the man for his ability to present statistics, such as he did in today's J/G.
His OP-ED article described how the city doesn't HAVE to raise the property taxes, or "take back" the property tax cut (set forth last year) to meet it's budgetary requirements. It's a good read, and worth a few minutes to ponder.
Now on to more "fun stuff"...
Jack Frost was real busy adorning our garage windows with some of his artwork, and after all the years I've seen this basic aspect of nature, it just NEVER gets old...does it?
That's why I had to get some pictures yesterday while all that nice snow was hugging the tree limbs. Yeah, I got a soft spot when it comes to appreciating the little things in life. I guess after you see so much crap, you revel in the simpler things.
It's also one of those "aching days after" scenarios for me. I shoveled the front, back AND driveway..TWICE, and I'm paying a good price for it. I've got muscles aching I didn't know I still HAD. But at least I was compliant with city ordinances...it's what I do.
BTW, in case you forgot, here's the ordinance regarding snow removal:

§ 99.047 REMOVAL OF ICE, SNOW AND DIRT.
Every owner or occupant of any house or other building, and the owner or proprietor, lessee or persons entitled to possession of any vacant lot, and every person having charge of any church, jail, public hall or other public building in the city, shall, during the winter season and during the time snow shall continue on the ground, by 9:00 a.m. every day clean the sidewalk in front of such house or building, and in front of which lot, from snow or ice, and keep it conveniently free thereof during the day. He shall also, at all times, keep such sidewalk clear from all dirt or filth, or other obstruction or encumbrance, so as to allow citizens to use the sidewalk in an easy and commodious manner.
Now I said all that to say this:
Take a good look at the picture of MY block (taken on my sidewalk), and tell me what is "odd" about the rest of the street.
A) There are no dead bodies around
B) There are no dead animals around
C) There are no signs of life
D) Mine is the ONLY sidewalk cleared of snow
E) All of the above
If you guessed *D*, give yourself a gold star!
(ed note - answering *E* would ALSO be acceptable)
Seems that we have a problem here, don'cha think? Now I KNOW for a fact that the rest of these houses DO have able-bodied young bucks and ladies living within those walls, quite capable of removing the snow. Question is: "Why the hell don't they?"
Must be some "cultural" thang.
Well, all that snow is relatively white, and that could explain some people's reluctance to bother with it. Still, we have other whites in the area (sleeping off last night's drunk or high until 11AM when it seems they ALL wake up and become the living dead for yet another day), and even THEY don't bother to shovel.
Must be a "southside" thang.
Excuse me for pleading ignorance when it comes to being a "Hoosier", but I thought all this Midwest charm meant something more than APATHY. I know back in Philly, most ALL the 60 families in just ONE block of rowhomes didn't have ANY problem clearing their walks, Hell, people even did one another's sidewalks as well (as I'm sure those of you in good neighborhoods are acustomed to). I recall one time about 20 of us guys got together and shoveled the entire ALLEY out back, so everyone could get to work (the ladies made us some hot chocolate and sandwiches). That was what neighborhoods USED to be like anyway.
Must be a "neighborhood" thang.
I hate to tell these lazy-asses in my area, but the city isn't going to get them a freebie when it comes to BASIC RESPONSIBILITY. You want to be a HOMEOWNER...then by Christ, you'd better get on the stick with what it means to BE a homeowner. And even if you're just a "tenant", that doesn't give you a "free-pass" to NOT show just a smidgen of responsibility by getting off your TV-watching ass, grabbing a shovel, and getting some fresh air and exercise for a few minutes. If you can walk down to Speedway for a soda, you damn well can get out front of the house, and do something PRODUCTIVE (for a change) .
But I suppose it will all come down to finding a way to FORCE these people to take some initiative, and that's sure to go over like a pregnant pole-vaulter.
Maybe it's time to call Captain Tom Bandor at NCE and get some people cited for non-compliance...after all, the city DOES need the "money", eh?

Another Snowjob...

If you have to go anywhere today, and it's NOT an emergency...DON'T.

Now THIS is a nice snowstorm...kinda gets the old "Winter Wonderland" in all of us going, doesn't it? And I fully expect to see some great pictures from fellow blogger and "ace" photographer Everett White soon enough.

But before we go and shovel ourselves out (and of course I'm not referring to the vast majority of those on the south side who do NOT shovel anything anywhere except Crunch N Munch and orange drink into their pieholes at the taxpayers' expense), let's take a brief look at other "snowjobs" around the area.

--Special Kind of Stupid Award:

Yes friends, we do have a winner this week. It's the mother of the two boys that were pulled from the St. Mary's river Sunday, who both later died early Monday morning. How the hell can she live that close to the river and NOT be responsible enough to supervise (to some degree) her 9year old and his 4 year old brother? I mean when mom and the two boys ALL have different last names, that alone should make you wonder. Maybe mom should have kept her legs shut a lot more often? Mom didn't even know HOW LONG they were missing (drugs will do that "time dilation" thing to people). Well "mom", unless you get your tubes tied, you got a good chance to start the process all over again...and maybe with two OTHER men.

It's called a LIFE LESSON, mom!

Congrats!

--City Council Discussions:

Tonight, the Ft. Wayne City Council will DISCUSS the TAX ABATEMENTS for the HARRISON SQUARE project.

(pause to listen as that OTHER shoe drops)

And this is the same City Council that would NOT hear any discussion about a change to the smoking ordinance, and passed Mayor Henry's failed attempt to revoke the tax CUT "King" Richard imposed on the populace last year.

Now Mayor (King) Henry is talking about cutting city services back (the FWPD academy class being put on hold is an example), and Chief Rusty is having officers save gas by NOT idling police cars unless necessary (now that's not a bad idea by itself).

The city wants to cut back, because they CAN'T tax us further (for the time being), and yet seeks to hand out ABATEMENTS to Harrison Square in the same sentence.

WTF is WRONG with this picture, people?

--No "Snow" Here:

Looks like Jarmarcus Lashley won't have to worry about shoveling snow (or bull$**t) either at home OR in the courtroom for a while. He's been handed an EIGHTY YEAR sentence for an armed home invasion/robbery last May. The former resident of the 3900 block of Warsaw St. received the sentence yesterday from Judge Surbeck, who ordered the sentences to served back-to-back, along with over $57K in restituion to the victims (didn't know you could get blood from a turnip). And if the homeowner had been a better shot, Jarmarcus wouldn't be costing the taxpayers 80 years worth of "penitence", if you get my drift. He'll probably be out in about HALF that time, which should make him old enough to get on SOCIAL SECURITY, so we pay for his sorry ass one way or another.

--A Final Note:

If you are staying inside today (and anyone that doesn't need to be somewhere should be staying off the streets), take a few minutes to watch some of the people. It's good for a giggle, trust me.

Watch them TRY and navigate unplowed streets, as they fishtail up pr down the block. If you're "fortunate" enough to be a SOUTH SIDE resident (and I know so many of you wish to hell you were every single day), you can watch the number of people NOT cleaning off their vehicles (except for the small slit on the driver's side windshield), NOT clearing a path to the vehicle, NOT clearing off their steps or sidewalk, but ARE walking in the street (funny, that's where all the VEHICLES travel too) in "athletic" shoes (boots and/or overshoes are too much a "white thang" for them) with their "saggy-baggies" dragging through the snow. And we wonder why their kids are out sick?

Oh, it's not a "poverty" thang... It's a "style" thang, 'yo.

Take your time shoveling...the snow IS heavy with moisture, and will take longer to clear. Pace yourself. Don't forget that MORE people suffer heart attacks while shoveling snow than during ANY other activity (and that includes THE HORIZONTAL MAMBO, folks).

Stay safe, stay warm, and drive VERY carefully out there, 'cause everyone else probably ain't!

We NOW return you to your regularly scheduled cup of coffee -

(laced with a wee dram of scotch)

And May the Farce Be With You.

Monday Musings...

The GOOD news is that vehicle thefts in Fort Wayne have gone DOWN.

The BAD news is that your vehicle still "could" be next.

I couldn't help reading yesterday's article in the Metro section of the J/G and NOT smile (just a little). Try as I might, I couldn't help smiling, and not in some perverted sarcastic manner. I was smiling because I know that so many stolen cars don't have to wind us as...well, stolen in the first place. And again, it's all about PEOPLE (just like Soylent Green).

After all this time, and regardless of how sophsticated an alarm system you may install on a vehicle, there are STILL people out there that just leave their vehicle running while they go back inside the house for whatever. And aside from that driver becoming the next poster child for that "special kind of stupid" award, that vehicle cries out "PLEASE STEAL ME...MY OWNER IS AS DUMB AS A BAG OF ROCKS"!

I have a saying that we used to use in Philly...a LOT:

"Set yourself up to become a victim, and someone will be there shortly to oblige you".

Granted the automakers have made it more difficult to steal cars today, what with the chip-imbedded keys (which can go wrong all by themselves and set you back a few HUNDRED bucks), as well as the after-market systems to deter theft. Note that I said "difficult to steal" and "deter theft". It's not impossible to steal ANY vehicle, given enough time . But when someone all but HANDS THE KEYS to a car thief, what can you do? Well, you could slap the car owner about the face and neck for a hour, but that will do little if nothing to improve their short-term memory,and will make your hand smart.

Now I have a (nearly) 25 year old car (yes, that picture is of my car), and still in pretty good condition (for only having less than 60K on the odometer), and I admit it has no alarm system, aside from me. I still use THE CLUB, because it will take time to defeat it. And so far...so good (plus the club can become a "weapon at hand", should the need arise, and can be fashioned into a hand-made shotgun with very few modifications, but that's another post for another time, and I'll have to kill you when I tell you anyway...lol). Oh, I also have a nasty habit of doing something many car owners seem to forget, namely LOCKING THE DAMN DOORS! And keep a spare door key in the wallet or purse, in case you lock yourself out with the motor running.

I even have a CLUB in my wife's car, and it's got those chip-key devices. Oh, about those keys...there are only about 6-7 DIFFERENT chips in them, so if you find yourself among a lot of other cars JUST like yours, chances are YOUR key will work in one of them (and vice versa).

Funny how the carmakers never tell you THAT bit of information.

Cars are stolen for a number of reasons.

They can be used for "spare parts" at the neighborhood chop-shop (like we USED to have in one garage in our area before I dimed to the FWPD about it). They can be stolen as a "getaway car" for a robbery elsewhere (and imagine your surprise when the police knock on your door asking where YOU have been while you car was seen leaving a bank robbery). Most people will steal a car for the "fun" of it, and to just joyride around until they get bored (yeah, even THEY suffer from ADHD), and dump it at some corner and bail out of it.

But whatever the reason, when it happens to YOU, it's a big deal.

The trick is...to NOT allow that to happen. If you have to warm up your vehicle, stay IN the vehicle, or if it's in the garage, keep the door cracked about 6 inches (if the emissions bother you). Most garages are drafty enough to allow the door to remain shut (like ours).

A large part of our problem today stems from the fact that we DEPEND on our vehicles SO much (we literally have to), and we still treat them like crap. You love your kids (hopefully), but would you leave them UNATTENDED at the curb (and NO, I'm not speaking to the dipshit parent that left her infant in her minivan last week on Warsaw St.) while you went back inside the house?

OK, so maybe we don't "love" our vehicles as much as our kids...and that's OK, but we still owe something to that machine we paid SO damn much money for that takes our asses from A to B whenever the mood strikes us, and in any weather, right?

For the average person, a vehicle will be the SECOND MOST EXPENSIVE item they will purchase (a house being #1), and you owe it to yourselves to NOT allow some thief the chance to make what is YOURS...THEIRS! You sure wouldn't think of leaving the front door unlocked on the house, if you didn't want what you have inside to go outside with some stranger, right?

Believe me, my Dad was so right when he said to me:

"You take care of your car, and it will take care of you".

That didn't mean give thieves a chance to steal it. It meant protect it. It's the often ignored family member, the one that's always ready, rarely gripes, and never has to be put through college. It's like a pet that eats fuel instead of Snausages, but is often JUST as loyal as your Labrador Retriever. So think twice every time you get behind the wheel. Do you want to hand the keys over to a thief? Or do you want to get to work, take the kids to soccer practice, or take your family to dinner?

For the average car owner...that choice should be REAL easy.

Friday Follies - Snowjob Edition...
Whenever it starts to snow, I start to cringe. And that's not based on a fear of driving in it...far from it. I've driven in everything from icestorms to major snowfalls (the winter of 78 excluded - NOBODY drove in that) to deluge type thunderstorms, and never encountered any REAL problems.
There was the ocassional "slip n slide", and even a "360" down an off ramp to the interstate, but never was there any damage to either the vehicle or the passengers inside.
I didn't cringe back then, but I do now.
I always worry becasue out there, in all that bad weather, is some moron wo got their license NOT from the BMV, but rather from Pep Boys! At least from the manner in which they drive (if you can call it that), it looks that way.
And they're real easy to spot.
They're the ones always spinning their wheels, because they don't know what that LETTER "L" or that NUMBER "1" means on the shifter. They haven't a damn clue as to WHY they're not motoring along as if it were nice and dry out.
After all, the world (seemingly) revolves around them.
They are the ones ALWAYS in some hurry...and it shows. You can see them fishtail thier way down the highway, breaking traction every few meters, and then attempting to correct. And it makes you watch your rearview mirror more than the road in front of you.
Not a good thing.
Whenever you see some multi-car pileup somewhere, you have to ask yourself: "Who was the numbnut that started all this?" Sure, we can always blame the weather...It can't defend itself. Blame that snow, and NOT the ability of the worst driver in that group who couldn't figure out that leaving a GREATER distance between vehicles is a lifesaver.
Granted, when the weather gets SO bad, hardly anything you do won't matter all that much. Then again, maybe you shouldn't be ON the road under conditions such as those.
No matter how you shake it out, it will ALWAYS come down NOT to the weather, or the vehicle, but ON THE PEOPLE. If Joey Jerkwad hadn't tried to pass during that blizzard, he might have seen the car in front trying to do the same, and 50 people COULD have ALL made it to work safely.
And along those lines of thought, another "Tale of the Ridiculous".
Yesterday at around 1300 hours, a call comes over the radio for a missing child. Described as a ONE YEAR OLD bi-racial boy (named LaMont), wearing a red & blue snowsuit and strapped into a carseat in a Dodge minivan along the 4600 block of Warsaw.
(**Note to J/G police reporter Abby Slutsky - it wasn't the 4100 block)
The mother went back in the house for something, taking her other two kids with her, and when she came back out, little LaMont was GONE. Well, that illicited a search throughout the Pettit-Rudisill area with 2 K-9 units, the fire department, and assorted FWPD cars.
My take on it was that the child didn't get out by himself...ain't NO 1 year old that can elude police that damn well in this weather.
Long story short:
The great grandmom of the child "happened" to be driving by at the right time, saw the unattended child and took him from the van to HER house in the 3900 block of Avondale. Oh, and she didn't call the boy's mother to let her know right away either ("to teach her a lesson").
Hell, I'd place a huge SIGN on her lawn that says:
CAUTION - IRRESPONSIBLE PARENT LIVES HERE!
(what a novel idea, Bob)
The boy was found later when G'mom called the house on Warsaw, safe and sound. Wonder how much of the city's resources were basically wasted because of ONE person's neglegence and stupidity. And there was plenty of STUPID to go around.
Mom ( this week's winner of the "Poster child for planned parenting" award) was stupid for leaving the child unattended (when she had two other kids that could have stayed in the damn van with this toddler).
Grandmom was stupid for taking the child, instead of stopping (blocking the street with her vehicle as a lot of folks around here love to do anyway) and staying with the child, or even going up and knocking on mom's door.
The other two kids were stupid for NOT watching the van either from the front door OR a window. Suppose a predator took the kid instead of grandma, hmm?
Stupid (truly) IS...as Stupid (honestly) DOES.
Have a SAFE weekend
Do drive carefully out there, because that person either alongside, in front of, or behind you...probably ISN'T.
That's not cynicism, that's common sense!

Takin' Out The Trash...

Today, I want to talk TRASH...and NO, that's NOT what I mean when I say that.
But let me preface this by congratulating the Navy for shooting down the dead satellite that was in danger of falling back to earth relatively intact.
To paraphrase a WW2 term:
"Sighted Satellite - Sank Same"
The USS Lake Erie launched an SM-3 missile last night and successfully acquired and disposed of the wayward satellite, which was about the size of a bus.
Pretty good shootin', pardner!
Looks like the AEGIS weapons system works pretty damn well. Confirmation that the fuel tank (full of toxic hydrazine) was destroyed will be available within 24 hours. But a defense offical close to the situation said that officials monitoring the collision saw what appeared to be an explosion, indicting that the fuel tank was hit.
DAMN good shootin', pardner!.
That's ONE way to "Take out the trash".
We here in Fort Wayne have another (aside from homicide).
We call it Serv-All.
And they come every week (well, most every week down here), pick up the trash and haul it away. And that seems a pretty easy task; you flip the bin into the truck, empty it, then return it to where you got it from.
As I said...easy.
There is, however, an inherent FLAW with the system here, and it comes back to PEOPLE (doesn't it always?) who can't get a grip on the procedure regarding the lowly trashbin.
Now, first off, a 96 gallon bin is designed to hold HOW MUCH TRASH? (all together, boys and girls)...."96 GALLONS WORTH, Bob" (thank you).
So why is it that people OVERLOAD these containers? If you'll note the pictures, the ONE bin NOT overloaded is OUR bin (which is a 48 gallon one). We don't seem to generate enough trash, compared to everyone else.
And as Bob's Rules of Life # 47 states:
"You can't NEVER get TEN pounds of $**t into a FIVE pound bag"!
Almost EVERY OTHER HOUSE around here produces enough trash for THREE homes, let alone their place. And every week, they PROUDLY place it out front (or at the alley), as a badge of "distinction". The really ODD thing is that these same people never seem to bring in enough items to warrant all the trash they place outside every week.
Now there is a law of physics that states that:
"For every ACTION, there is an opposite and equal REACTION".
Well, someone never told THESE folks, because they have this inverse proportion of trash production that laughs in the face of conventional physics.
For EVERY BAG they bring INTO the house, they produce THREE BAGS of trash LEAVING the house. At least that's as close as I can estimate. If we could somehow turn that around to FUEL PRODUCTION, we could tell OPEC to piss off real fast!
Now I know that with every bin comes a pamphlet that tells what you can and cannot place IN the bin, as well as where you're supposed to keep the bin BETWEEN trash pickup days. And let me say that most everyone else has not READ that pamphlet (must be that cultural beast rearing it's ugly head again..."education is a white thang").
Even though there are a FEW that follow the guidelines (like dumb old me), and act as EXAMPLES for those less inclined to adhere to ANY type of "authority" (even if it's for the health & betterment of the community), it's all for naught, as everyone else does as they damn well please (it's too much like real work I suppose).
You DON'T keep the trashbin next to the damn FRONT DOOR of the house, you lazy-ass.
That is just SO damn ghetto.
There is another down side to overfilling these bins, and that's the fact that something will inevitably fall FROM the bin, causing enough carrion-seeking CROWS to flock that it makes the Million Man March tame by comparison.
It's damn near Hitchcockian in nature. All we need is Tippy Hedren and some schoolkids running past that playground!
But that doesn't matter to the "neighbors".
It's out of THEIR primate hands.
Nothing really matters to them, unless it's entertainment-oriented.
(Happy-Happy, Joy-Joy)

Btw...nice eclipse last night...now THAT was entertainment!

Humpday Happenings...
Another dusting of snow welcomes us as we awake today. Let's hope it IS only a dusting, right?
The last thing we need is some sneaky-ass stormfront to come along, park it's butt over us and dump 2 feet of snow, eh?

With that said, let's see what's going on elsewhere...

-Castro Steps Down -
Well, I wouldn't break out the CIGARS just yet on this, and don't think we're going to be getting any of those wonderful hand-rolled CUBAN stogies in the near future.
Any trade sanctions we already have in place with Cuba (since 1960 to be exact) will pretty much remain there, unless Fidel's brother (Raoul) decides to turn over a "new leaf" (no pun intended), and change the course of his nation.
But it's not like attempting to climb out of third world status would be such a BAD thing for Cuba (in the 21st century), right?
RRRrrriiiiiiggghhhhttt!

-More "Dead-End Tech"-
If you're one of the people who bought an HD-DVD player in the hopes it would oust the Blu-Ray format from the market, join us scores of diehard "betaphiles" who thought along the same lines during the '80s VCR format wars between VHS and BETA.

As I reported HERE back on 8 January, BLU-RAY is going to be the leader in high-definition DVD...period. Since nearly ALL the studios had previously decided to release new material ONLY in Blu-Ray format, it stood to reason that HD-DVD was down for the count. Personally, I like my (low-def) DVD player just fine, thank you. It makes a nice addition to my TURNTABLE...and my BETAMAX VCR!

-Trending AGAIN?-
Seems that Fort Wayne has "enjoyed" a 4% INCREASE in property values, in sharp contrast to the 13% INCREASE from last year. The assessments (also previously reported and bashed here) serve as a basis for the monkey that flies out of the county's ass...uh, I mean a basis for the formula used to create the tax bills, which have yet to be mailed.

I've stated here at length how the assessing process is unjust to owners of properties in "blighted" areas, with THESE PEOPLE paying a majority of the taxes. And while sales migh be brisk (people just want to get the f$ck AWAY from this place and it's indigenous species) as FOR SALE signs pop up like weeds, the selling PRICES for these properties is ANYTHING BUT HIGHER than they (or any other nearby properties) have sold for in the past.

Time to trash these "trends" (and whatever methodology is used to falsify actual numbers in lieu of what the county wants out of your pocket), and get back to REALITY. These assessors need to get their asses IN these areas, open their eyes, take a look around, and THEN still tell me my place is worth MORE (because I'm WHITE? Because I take care of the place? Because you people KNOW you can rip us off?) than it was ten years ago. And after I get done laughing in their face, we'll discuss why they should NOT be in the job they are.

-Oil Prices Over $100 a barrel-
We knew this was coming like a jail on wheels. And we're not at a loss as to WHO we can blame.
Just take a number, and have a seat.
Someone will be with you shortly to chew you a new ass.

Curiously, there was no SINGLE driver behind the rise in price. But when I saw that refinery fire in Texas, I said to my wife: "We're gonna see a jump in prices REAL soon". Sure enough...BINGO. AND...OPEC will cut production next month.
AND...there's new violence in Nigeria.
AND...continuing tensions between the U.S. and Venezuela.
AND...the economy is weak.
AND...rising oil prices means (all together, gang)...HIGHER prices at the PUMPS!
We're back over $3 a gallon, again. With our weakening economy, we will probably see $3.50-$3.60 a gallon prices for gasoline.

Where's that Purdue professor and his water-fueled engine when we NEED him?

-And For All You Stargazers-
Tonight is the last lunar eclipse...until 2010 (had 'ya goin' for a second). We should be able to view it here in the Summit City. So get some hot cocoa ready, and take yourselves outside about 2200 hrs (10PM for you civvies) and watch the show.

As a bonus feature, Saturn, and Regulus (brightest star in the constellation Leo) will pop out and "sandwich" the moon.

And let's not forget that errant satellite that is being targeted by an SM-3 missile (being specially adapted for the "op"). The "shootdown" clock starts tonight, and a portion of the Pacific is being cleared of aviators and mariners starting around 2230 hrs. The tricky part is that the SM-3 is a heat-seeking missile, and the satellite doesn't have a heat source propulsion system for a typical lock-on.
But it is relatively inexpensive a venture at a "mere" $30-$40 million.

So there we are...all the news you need to know.

A Study In Entropy...

No, this isn't a new Sherlock Holmes story, but rather the curious conundrum the USAF finds itself in with the large part of their air fleet getting older (as are we all).

I posted a while back about the grounding of much of the fleet of F-15 fighters due to structural fatigue found in one of the main supports for what we would call the "spine" of the aircraft. And now it's prompted the Air Force into looking at rest of their airworthy inventory to see if this was just an isolated case.

Webster's dictionary defines ENTROPY as:

The steady degradation or disorganization of a system or a society.

Let's just say that the Air Force didn't like what it found.

So Air Force officials are warning that unless their budget is increased dramatically AND soon, the military's high-flying branch won't be dominating the skies as it has for decades.

Let's face facts; after more than 6 years of war in the Middle East, the aging fighters, bombers, tankers, cargo aircraft and gunships are at that tipping point of maximum entropy, and that new aircraft are needed fast. War has a tendency to do that to machinations of conflict.

It's not like you're driving to and from work in your Honda, and the worst thing you'll encounter will be a pothole. We're talking going to and from "work" at speeds (in many cases) in excess of the speed of sound. And while you're "at work", you might have to dodge some "triple-A" (anti-aircraft artillery) fire, so you do a lot of "jinking" (high speed turns and swerves) to keep what you left the ground with attached to the aircraft when you get back.

That will make a crew chief happy to NO end!

They hate replacing parts and patching holes on "their" plane that they LOANED to the pilot.

The stress that these airframes encounter far surpasses most every other aircraft built, including passenger jets (which suffer from their own unique version of stress-related problems).

Maj. Gen Paul Selva (dir- strategic planning) said: "If we're going to do the missions you ask us to do, it will require this kind of investment. Failing that, we take what is already a geriatric Air Force and we drive it for another 20 years into an area of uncertainty".

And the grand total is...(drum roll)....$100 BILLION DOLLARS.

We're talking about an extra $20 billion over the next 5 years, beginning with an Air Force budget of about $137 billion in 2009. And the hope of getting all that money seems dim at best for now. As in times past, we've seen that recessions, rising federal deficits, and distaste for higher taxing of the public all lead to declines in defense spending.

There are those that feel the USAF's predicament is largely self-inflicted.

Both the F-22 Raptor and the F-35 Lightning (JSF) are drastically more expensive aircraft, yet they are to replace the aging F-15s and F-16s. And they can do more than their predecessors, so there is ALWAYS a trade-off. Yet these two fighters alone will assure that the USAF has air supremacy for years to come, if not decades for three of the armed services (with the JSF alone).

The problem comes with constantly upgrading weapons systems when perfectly sound systems are already proven and in place. We can blame that on lobbyists for large corporations that gobble up government contracts food at the all-you-can-eat buffet. When you focus on WEAPONS (alone), the PLANES will suffer the most, when it comes to entropy.

The USAF has added new aircraft over the last 15 years, such as the V-22 Osprey (finally got all the bugs worked out of that with Boeing), the C-17 Globemaster (which replaced the C-141 Starlifter), and the B-2 Stealth bomber. We do however still have a fleet of B-52s (as old as me) that have a few more years of life left in them, but they don't deal with the manuevers the old Falcons and Eagles have to endure.

After only 5000 hours, an F-15 disintegrated in flight during a routine training mission over Missouri. As these planes age, corrosion will eat away at parts...that's one of those inevitabilities of life. Wiring will get brittle, chafe and fail. Sealing will harden and become useless. These are all components of entropy.

We can't afford to place our servicemen and women at risk every time they get behind the stick and take to the skies to preserve freedom. We need to cut the fat while ensuring the budget for the Air Force includes planes that will remain safe.

And even if that means purchasing new aircraft from another nation, then so be it. We've sold OUR planes around the world.

Perhaps Gen. John D.W. Corley, head of Air Combat Command at Langley AFB, VA sums it up best: "An hour is NOT an 'hour' when it comes to these aircraft. It's like DOG YEARS".

If that's the case, General, most of us (myself included) are already "dead".

I'm (like many of these planes) just too damn busy to lay the hell down!

Hey, Assess THIS...
Last Friday we received our *new* (as of March 2007) tax assessment for our property, which had been previously assessed at $76.3K, then dropped to $72K.
Now we were fully expecting that after the SNAFU over Allen County's assessment "formulae", we'd be seeing a far different number (read LOWER...much lower, and NO, that's NOT our house in the photo). This SHOULD be based on other property sales in our area, which have gone for FAR under assessed (and even market) values. Having seen most every other decent person move AWAY from here and taking a hit on THEIR selling prices (nobody got close to what they originally asked, which was tame in comparison to OTHER parts of the city), I was sure we'd see an appreciable DROP in OUR assessment.
This is one of those RARE times when I was WRONG (mark your calendars, 'cause this happen all that often).
The NEW assessment is $2.8K HIGHER than the previous $72K.
I was like...WTF?
Geez, it must be that only WORKING people who MAINTAIN a HOUSE THEY OWN (and also live in) are the ones that get socked for higher taxation in "distressed" areas. Does the city want to see our house become another Section 8 rental THAT damn bad? You "buy us out" for the amount of (the original) $76.3K, and watch HOW FAST we book outta town!!!
We bought this house (and property) on contract from my in-laws for $40K almost ELEVEN years ago, and I know for CERTAIN that we cannot get that amount today. In fact, I'd be surprised if we got within $3K of that number (based on other sales in the area over the past 5 years).
Funny thing was, every other person that was paying taxes on properties assessed WAY HIGHER than "real-market" values were all WHITE (in predominantly ethnic areas). I had checked the tax records online and SAW the numbers. Imagine that.
I saw one (former) neighbor have a 108% rise in HIS taxes on his property. I guess we were fortunate that ours "only" went up 82% in that last assessment. And yet we have properties selling for as low as $2500 within a one block radius! Who the hell is making these assessment numbers up, anyway, because they definitely need to check REALITY at least once in a while.
So let's "do some math" on this, shall we?
--Our property (land & structures) is assessed at $74.8K (this week).
--Our property MIGHT give us $40K if it were to be FOR SALE tomorrow.
--We'd probably ONLY get around $35k-$38K (tops).
--Basically, the house is worth what it WAS TEN YEARS AGO (if not less).
Make no mistake, the neighborhood has NOT gotten better, ergo property values are AT BEST...STATIC, and AT WORST...depreciating EVERY SINGLE year. And yet, we're bucking this trend, as the COUNTY actually has the balls to say to us, in our "distressed and blighted" part of Fort Wayne: "Your property is worth MORE every year...honest".
That's a crock of you-know-what.
We're looking at a $40K property that the COUNTY says should be TAXED AS IF it were ACTUALLY worth $74.8K. Where is this additional $34.8K coming from, other than the clear blue sky, because I'm sure as hell NOT seeing it?
Somebody at the City/County building is making some SERIOUS MONEY off of (just) us, aren't they? And I'd wager this very pattern is being REPEATED all over the city (and county). Why is that? Because Allen County can GET AWAY WITH RIPPING PEOPLE OFF...that's why!
Maybe it's time to "call them" on this once and for all, and stop the bull$hit! This whole ass-backwards rhetoric concerning "real" value vs "assesed" value is just so much crap for the compost pile.
If you own a vehicle, there aren't any "two differing and distinct values" that the vehicle is worth. You don't pay insurance on some "assessed" value of the vehicle, and then trade it in for the lower "real book" value of the vehicle.
That dog just won't hunt.

I need someone to "splain" this BS to me, because my logic is in conflict. My COMMON SENSE tells me one thing (which I believe to be correct, based on decades of acquired knowledge), while some dip$**t assessor from the COUNTY ( that hasn't even seen this neighborhood OR my house) "says" something completely "180" from what SHOULD be the FACTS.
I got a novel solution for all this...how's about I pay ONLY the tax on the HONEST TO CHRIST REAL VALUE of OUR F$CKING PROPERTY, which is around $40K, and you circle-jerk someone ELSE for the rest of the money (that would be this "magical" $34.8K you pulled out your ass) that you're trying to swindle me out of, kapesh?
I'm not playing YOUR "game" any longer, so you can take your toys and go the hell home.
And don't let the door hit your ass on the way out.
Then maybe I won't feel so bad about paying taxes on what I REALLY OWN and WHAT IT'S REALLY WORTH, as opposed to some arbitrary number that YOU "think" I should be paying, because I TAKE CARE of the property I OWN, and am not some rental transient piece of human $**t, that Section 8 is subsidizing into what USED to be a nice area of the city, turning it into another damn ghetto.
Yeah...that about sums it up nicely.
NOW...we have parity, folks!

Welcome To The Weekend...

Seemed like it would NEVER get here.

Weatherwise, I haven't a clue as to what to REALLY expect. So I'll just plan for the worst while expecting the best. That means keep the shovel handy, the parka nearby, and the driveway cleared, unless you live on the SOUTHSIDE where only a handful of us actually KNOW what a shovel is...and actually USE it (it involves doing some WORK).

And for God's sake, clear the ENTIRE vehicle off when it gets snowed on. You can't see $**T when you've got a peep hole scraped in ONLY the damn windshield, you morons! And clear the head and tail lights, too, dumbass. They don't "self-defrost" just because you have them ON!

(whew)

I WOULD like to finish the week in a lighter vein, seeming as we just came off one of the most romantic days on the calendar year.

So, without any further ado, I bring you some military humor (and practicality).

CAUTION - PLEASE USE RESPONSIBLY.

Marine Corps Rules for Gun Fighting:

1. Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns.

2. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.

3. Only hits count. The only thing worse than a miss is a slow miss.

4. If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough nor using cover correctly.

5. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal movement are preferred.)

6. If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a long gun and a friend with a long gun.

7. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.

8. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating, reloading, and running.

9. Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on "pucker factor" than the inherent accuracy of the gun.

10. Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.

11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.

12. Have a plan.

13. Have a back-up plan, because the first one won't work.

14. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.

15. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.

16. Don't drop your guard.

17. Always tactical load and threat scan 360 degrees.

18. Watch their hands. Hands kill. In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them.

19. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.

20. The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.

21. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

22. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.

23. Your number one option for personal security is a lifelong commitment to avoidance, deterrence, and de-escalation.

24. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun, the caliber of which does not start with a "4."

Navy Rules for Gun fighting:

1. Go to Sea

2. Send in the Marines

3. Drink Coffee

Air Force Rules for Gun Fighting:

1. Take off.

2. Locate a hostile target.

3. Get a good tone.

4. Push a button and smile.

5. Repeat as necessary.

6. Return to base.

Army Rules for Gun Fighting:

1. Refer to Marine rules but de-escalate to a factor of 2

2. When in doubt, call in artillery.

3. When REALLY in doubt, call in air support!

4. When rules 2 or 3 don't apply, call in the RANGERS!

(If none of the above works, you just ain't doin' somethin' right!)

DO have a safe weekend.